I'll be honest. I don't always know why people are moved. I'm not always aware of the effect that I may have on someone. I most often do something for the sake of art and honesty then turn around later to find that I've created a small monster. My place as a cover girl on Ebony magazine. My 2011 head shaving & photo shoot. Getting engaged 👀. Literally not thinking about the worlds response but the truth is, for some reason, embracing what I see as true tends to resonate and validate someone else's journey. That doesn't make me any less afraid to step out first.
Authenticity sells. We talk about the value of sex and it's selling power. Often beauty and fashion are berated by the self righteous who look at commercial success as selling out. The truth is, people purchase what resonates with them.
There are many audiences. 100's of them. The skill in being successful is knowing who you speak to in your purest form and making yourself available to that group of people.
The hard part in being a creative entrepreneur is most of us judge ourselves harder than people are actually judging us. We wait until we see someone else doing something we want to do before we're brave enough to put ourselves out there. In wanting to belong, we forget where our actual value lies. It's not in the words of people. It works the other way around. If you've been given the gift of sharing, you are the beginning of the communication. It starts with you.
The truth is, fear of authenticity usually has to do with a need for healing. The parts of your beauty you're unwilling to bare are often the victim of a life crime. Take a look at what is beautiful to you in private. What hurts there? What happened? See it? Taking the time to explore your insecurities and mend them, is a pre-cursor to sharing what is authentically you. Ouch. Want my therapists number? Talk to me in the comments section.
Trial and error win the race. Giving and then receiving feed back is your best friend. Give what is TRULY you and believe that there is a group of people who need you. In her book, "Fabulosity", Kimora Lee Simmons said that she felt unwanted in one place and so she moved to another and was welcomed.
It's not about not being yourself, it's about knowing there are many audiences and with great patience, sacrifice, honesty and thick skin, you will grow and cultivate your very own demographic. You may grow such a large audience that they become a distinct resemblance of your offering. That's when you can create a name for the group of people who you love and love you.
I call my niche, my group, my tribe Rich Hipster Nation. It took ten years of trial and error, exposing and rescinding. I finally feel like I have some understanding, some what of a safer place for me to express myself but I am still always expanding, trying new things and pulling my fingers away from the fire when I'm petrified. I'm human. You're human.
Listen. Life is like a third grade cafeteria. You walk in on the first day and never know where to sit. You try out new tables and you fake or you tell the truth. I was so awkward (independent is a better word) that my most comfortable seat during lunch was in the band room with the show choir nerds and band junkies. Look at me now.
Tell your truth. Be authentic. It may take a minute. Sex is popular because we all have it! (Hopefully with a secure mate who's promise is to love us forever.) But, I promise you, if you spend enough time grooming you, loving you, cutting away the excess and shaping you, it will sell just where it's supposed to, in due season.
Be well, be lifted.
PS. Fear is a jerk that gets in the way of great destiny. Punch it in the face and be authentic!